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Fear of Driving


for 21 år siden 0 7 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
thank you so much for your support...both of you. thanks for the idea about posting it on the fridge...that way, i cant avoid it...i like to eat LOL also....i need to tell everyone i know of my goal...so ppl can hold me up to it :) i also want to try a reward system..for myself. I did this when i went on my exercise program. and believe it or not, i stuck to it..and didnt "cheat" w/ my rewards. as i accomplished more, i spread the rewards out to not become "bored" w/ them. i nkow i just gotta do it..........i am thinking about seeing a free counselor at my univ...i want to avoid ANY medications whatsoever....as i think it has something to do w/ my fear (long story short...a family member was addicted to xanax, and would drive while on them....and her reaction time was really slow, got into a few wrecks w/ her..and a TON of scary close calls) hoping they can teach me some relaxation techniques and things to do about controlling my anxiety (i am also reading up on everyone's posts for help w/ that too..got great ideas already) for a while i was content w/ not driving...but now its my only option. I am sick of it..plus its hurting some of my relationships.........and i just hate the fact that i HAVE to depend on other ppl thanks for your help dinner time :) i will bbl!!
for 21 år siden 0 16 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Dear PinklEfant: Yes, I have been where you are. Unfortunately,nothing succeeds like success and I found I had to "pray" and push myself to learn better. As my skills improved, the nerves subsided a little each time. I am still constantly learning new defensive driving skills and becoming more aware of what's happening around me when I drive. One psychology professor I knew, said driving is a skill that needs to become "overlearned" before one is really comfortable and skilled at it. It is the "overlearning" that allows one to drive without the forced constant attention (read nerves) that goes with being a learner. So, unfortunately, the only really cure is to just drive and learn and drive a little longer and better each time. I always took my husband or son (who is an excellent driver) with me until I mastered highway driving. And, yes, that was really scary at first!!!! I have eaten enough butterflies to last a lifetime, but I don't know of anyother way around it. I managed without pills of any sort, as I wanted to have my wits about me on the 400-series highways. So, good luck to you! Remind yourself that as you procrastinate, you are only elongating the self-torture. Accept the fear, go with it and just learn to drive better. The anxiety will diminish eacdh time you drive, honestly. But as long as you put it off, it will haunt you and convince you that you will never or simply cannot drive. Meditation and prayer helped me (not while driving) but at other times during the day so that my subconscious became accustomed to the notion of driving and accepting all the risks in order to hone my skills. You can do the same. You are much younger than I am. Love & prayers, JitteryMom (past the jitters, can you believe it???) ;)
for 21 år siden 0 1062 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Good for you. If you think your biggest impediment is your avoidance in getting out to practive, then how about writing out a schedule and placing it on the fridge Each time you go to the fridge, repeat some positive statements about meeting that deadline?
for 21 år siden 0 7 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
also....i have set a goal for myself...i want to be able to drive on streets :) real streets, w/ other cars...by my birthday in august.
for 21 år siden 0 7 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
what i usually do is get in the driver seat....w/ the car on...and sit there. i usually sit there for about 10 minutes and i finally get ready to put it in drive. I sit w/ my foot on the break for another 5 minutes...and then i idle around for another couple of minutes before i actually put my foot on the gas. i dont know if its my nerves....or just flat avoidance for the reasons why i don't go back for another month or so. grr brandi
for 21 år siden 0 1062 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi, Pink. If each driving experience is setting you backfor months, then perhaps you're taking too big a step at one time. For instance, have you tried just sitting in the car for an hour every day for a week or two until it becomes boring, and then taking another small step further?
for 21 år siden 0 7 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
hi all. i just joined today. I am hoping to relate my fears w/ others..to know i am not alone...and hopefully other's struggles will show me that my fears can be overcome. i am 22 y/o and have a HUGE fear of driving. when i was smaller i couldnt WAIT to turn 16 so i could drive...yet i was scared to death to drive go carts, golf carts etc. when i finally DID turn 16, i could NOT drive....hell i could barely RIDE in a car. i can now ride w/ a select few ppl...my mom, my bf, and 2 friends. I am TIRED of depending on them.....i am normally a very independent person.....but bc of this, i have become to dependent on others. (i cant just up and go anywhere...cant go where i want, when i want etc) everyone is very helpful...and they put up w/ it. i am afraid to become to big of a burden for everyone. I need to do this for myself...and for them. i want to get over this. i have driven about 5 times since i turned 16........all but one has been at an empty stadium parking lot. i get all geared up to overcome this...and i go out to drive...and i think it overwhelms me so much in 15 minutes of driving...that it takes me months to get out there and do it again....i try to avoid it if i can. i am tired of doing that. i want to drive, i want to meet my mom, or my bf places (instead of waiting for them to come pick me up etc) i want to drive my bf around...like he has done for so long for me. I am tired of my schedule revolving around who and when someone can pick me up.......and having THEIR schedule made around mine....its not fair to anyone thanks for letting me babble on here.....
for 21 år siden 0 16 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Thanks, Anne Marie, for your emotional support and for just "being there". Will keep in mind your adz about going back one step and trying to keep stable. JoyfulMom, Dale :)
for 21 år siden 0 1062 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Congratulations, JitteryMom! That's quite an acheivement. Now remember, if you have other panic attacks, to just go back one step, not all the way. Keep things at a steady pace as much as possible. I so pleased for you.
for 21 år siden 0 16 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Alleluia!!! Thank God, I passed my driving exam this morning and now have my full driving license. It has been many long months of rigourously curbing my negative thinking processes and trying to substitute positive, encouraging ones... mighty difficult, but with the tips I have been reading here, and my wonderful husband's coaching & practical tutoring, I have finally succeeded, despite still feeling gawdawful nervous this morning for the test and forcing myself to focus anyway. It was a big immersion and gut wretching, but success feels wonderful and, of course, the nerves are gone now!!! My anxiety was really focused around the testing as I actually love to drive now. Strange how powerful our minds really are and we seldeom realize it. All you wonderful people have my prayers and wishes for your own success ... which will come with a little more perseverence and hard work. Flooding and immersion really do work, if you can stand the gut wretching nerves -- you will eventually pass through the dark tunnel. Love to all, JitteryMom :)

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