Wow Jules.... you pretty much pinned down how I'm feeling. Day 4 and I knew to be prepared. It started out well enough, but by 4pm I couldn't even post. I can't even write much now except I know I need to. Day 4 seems to be the breaking point. Either keep going or give in.
When I was about to go into town, I did keep going back because I thought I forgot something. I checked my purse, keys, money, lights, coffee pot, t.v. locked the door......
I didn't give in. I'm in so much pain though. I know day 5 gets better (I hope). What the heck is in the ingredients of cigarettes anyway????
Last night I had a dream...... I dreamed that I had bought a new car that was 4 days old (same days old as my quit). It was beautiful, and I had invested a lot. A yucky looking guy walked by and threw in a taffy ball the size of a softball and told me that it was herion (which I have never seen). There were people clawing at the new car trying to get to the herion.
I'm not sure why I had that dream, but I can say that besides everyone here, the people that I hold dear have never smoked except for my mom, and they are having a hard time understanding (perhaps the heroin ball). I finally had to tell them not to text, email, phone, or drop by for 2 days. Don't throw stuff into my new car! :)
I'm glad I wrote tonight. I was feeling hopeless, but your message Jules kept me going. I'm going to go change into my jammies, take a wonderful deep breath, and get some sleep.
You also are doing so well. I'm sorry that I missed the beginnings of your quit. You have what it takes, not only to quit, but to help others with their quit. Thanks to you and Marvini too for your posts today.
deborah
My Milage:My Quit Date: 7/21/2009
Smoke-Free Days: 4
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 96
Amount Saved: $38.40
Life Gained:Days: 0
Hrs: 10
Mins: 0
Seconds: 58