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for 13 år siden 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Debora,
You're in my prayers too
for 13 år siden 0 1665 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi D:  Sorry you are having another hard day and sorry your friend said that to you.  I read that you prayed the rosary, you are Catholic?  I am R.C. also.  Believe me, I've never heard that one about God not wanting to help someone.  He is a loving God, His Will not ours.  Believe that He will help you, that He is with you every step of the way.  Know that He cares.  Give all your problems to Him, He will help.
 
Remember tonight to be good to yourself.  You've been through a lot today, so pamper yourself now.  Go and have that nice hot soak in the tub, sip an herbal tea or a hot milk. (put a drop of vanilla in if you don't like hot milk by itself).  And go ahead and have a good cry while soaking if you feel like it.  Do you have a favourite movie you can watch later, a good book to read, a hobby?  Time to sit and relax with something pleasurable.
 
Sounds like the triggers might be your physical symptoms which frighten you.  I remember I had chest pains and that caused anxiety.  Instead of letting that spiral out of control with "what if's", negative thoughts of illness, I would say to myself "oh, I'm just overtired so I'll take a break.  I'm alright, everything is o.k." something along those lines.  Right then I would sit and do the muscle relaxation ex. or listen to a tape.  Might still feel a bit shaky afterward, but would breathe deeply and concentrate on tasks at hand.  I didn't know about journaling in those days, but sounds like a good idea to write it all down so you can see how illogical the thoughts are.  Maybe you can find your triggers that way too.  Have paper and pen ready and don't forget to answer the 10 questions.
Not trying to tell you what to do, just suggesting and sharing what worked for me.
 
cheering for you,
Sunny
 
Sunny
for 13 år siden 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Debora

Well you sound better. Do you think you could challenge your triggers? Do you think you could write them down, like you did in that post but instead of panicking can you write down all the reasons the trigger is wrong? Journaling does work. If you had of wrote down all the reasons she was wrong then you would have had no reason to panic and also the distraction would have helped to keep the panic away. Even if the panic has already started. It will far easier shut down if it has a reason and journaling is the reason. Even if you think something is right, write down the reasons it could be wrong. This works.
Getting pretty late there, have a good evening and if you can't write down all the reasons you should, starting with God loves you.

Davit.
for 13 år siden 0 542 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
No Davit you did not step over any line. my friend did. noone can speak for God and there is no wrong way to prayer. I guess she is frustrated with me because she wants the "old debora" back, noone wants that more than me. She did kinda kick me when I was down you are right and God did send Sunny and You and this site to help me. I will try to put that negative scary thought out of my mind. Maybe she meant well but it did not come out or go over well, she is probably frustrated I am not better yet and does not suffer from it so she cannot understand but she must be careful what she says not to cause me more fear. Thank you Davit.
for 13 år siden 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Debora.

I didn't know there was a right way to pray. I also didn't know that people knew Gods will. Seems though that if someone knows this they must have an in that I don't know about. How do you know God is not answering your prayers. Be careful what you ask for, you may not like what God sends you. So you wanted God to snap his fingers and cure you, and instead he sent you me and sunny and a help site. Maybe your idiot friend can tell you why since she seems to know Gods will. A couple of saying. "God helps those that help themselves" and "you will appreciate something more if you have to earn it". Believe me, if anyone could snap there fingers and take away your panic, it would just come back. To make it go away and stay away you have to be able to snap your fingers and make it go away. And you can learn to do this. So tell me again that God isn't listening to you. Who you going to listen too, some one who knows how to do this and cares or someone who thinks your an idiot because they are and think that everyone else is too. 
You have a choice here, tough love or no love. 

Davit.  

I might have stepped over the line here but I do not like people that kick someone when they are down. Moderators, feel free to delete this.
for 13 år siden 0 542 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Oh Davit and Sunny,
 
I just had a major attack I am still shaking and crying from it. I woke up my usual nervous self I tried ignore it and get some work done and listen to music, the body symptoms again drove me into one, the nausea the stomach pain the blurred vision the headache the shaking and boom I cannot float through these. my friend is angry at me she said "you must not be praying right" she said all the prayer going up for me I should of been better by now, I think I pray right from the heart for recovery for my husband and son to have their wife and mother back, they say noone has ever gone crazy or had a heart attack from this but thats getting harder to believe these attacks cannot be good for youre body I know, I am so wrung out right now, I am taking the med doing the CBT and trying to think positive but the scary symptoms and thoughts are my undoing. this just has to go away or at least lessen I cannot go on like this, what do you do where do you turn when therapy meds CBT and my nurse cant help? I am fighting so hard for my life back. Its going on 10 months now and I dont know if I can survive I am so afraid I am going to keel over, noone knows what to say or do for me anymore I know I cant learn to live with it I mean who could? I am sorry I sound so bad, four hours of intense fear and then the attack took everything out of me and I was all alone and now my friend pretty much said God will not help me! I wish she did not say that that is so scary. I just want this to end.
for 13 år siden 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Debora.

If you do not have to work for a living or do not have a schedule for the day then temporarily you can put the day/night routine on hold. Is there any reason you have to sleep at night other than it is the normal thing to do? Any reason why you can't get a cup of tea, some cookies and watch a movie till you fall asleep? In a chair even. It won't last for ever. Once you accept that this is okay you will most likely go back to a normal routine. I'm retired, If I can't sleep I don't let it worry me.
Hell I'll even clean house or do laundry in the middle of the night. And if I need a nap during the day, well so be it. See it isn't every day, it just is sometimes. Accepting it is one less reason to worry about it. And no one will know if you don't tell them.

Is the reason you can't nap because you feel guilty? Accept that right now you are sick and need to do what ever you have to till you are better.

If you have GAD then panic or more correctly the worry about panic just adds one more worry to the list of worries you have. It becomes a circle after a while with one feeding the other. 

An interesting thing about worry is that people that worry don't do it as much as they think. It is just such a heavy focus that it seems like it. The truth is that it comes in lumps and there are worry free periods in between. The thing to do is to look for those worry free periods and try to extend them some how. Like watching a movie in the middle of the night. Finding distractions to keep worry at bay is constructive and well worth the time.

Placebo effect is used when physical pains are caused by anxiety. Basically it is telling yourself that a routine or a product will work even if it shouldn't. Like telling yourself that a cup of ginger mint tea will stop a stomach ache. It has too since you just said it will. So you do it and if it is anxiety it will work because if it is anxiety there is no physical reason for it to be there. If your mind can put it there your mind can take it away. A couple of time of the placebo working and it will work all the time. 
Companies know this, so if they advertise something hard enough you will believe something works even if it really doesn't and buy it. And since it is supposed to work it does, even if it doesn't really.

The other thing you can do and this is related to worry time, is focus on the pain and try to keep it there. The theory is that if it isn't really there you will get bored with trying to keep it there and let go of it. How well this works I don't know. Theory also is that if you don't get bored with it then it is probably real and you need to do something with it.

I always assume it is emotional till I prove it is physical. The potential is always there for anxiety. Of course sometimes I'm wrong like when I broke my Fibula and didn't know it till I had it X-rayed to stop thinking about it. Sure enough, it was broke. 

You know anxiety reduces your resistance and allows you to acquire ulcers. So even if it is anxiety it still can be physical. Well there is stuff for both these conditions.

Davit.
for 13 år siden 0 1665 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Debora:  I was diagnosed with GAD several yrs. ago.  I know what you mean about waking up with a startle.  Have had that happen too.  Just a suggestion, try a muscle relaxation exercise when you lie down.  I used to do this all the time when having a lie down, it relaxes you into a more restful state.  Do you have some relaxing music you can play very quietly for background while you do your exercises?  I found this helpful too.  Sometimes just the music helped and often I found I had fallen asleep before it was over.  A visualization of a beautiful spot you like to be is helpful too.  I like the ocean and the sand and palm trees swaying in the breeze.  Sometimes I visualize a cottage by a lake with those big flat granite rocks where the pines grow and smell so good in the hot summer.  We used to have a cottage there when I was a child and I remember the happy times.  Can you think of a place like that where you were happy and carefree?  Sometimes I design my own beautiful space where I can do what I please, money no object, decorate it the way I would like, placing things around me which mean the most to me.  A safe secure place which no one can enter except by my invitation.
 
Have fun visualizing your own safe happy place,
Sunny
 
 
for 13 år siden 0 542 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Davit,
 
 That is so ironic that you would mention GAD, I was just thinking that exact same thing, a few minutes later I logged on site and you mentioned it. I probably do have that along with the panic depression and agorophobia. Like tonight I tried to take a nap because I was so tired and I kept waking up every 3 minutes like with a start, do you know what I mean, maybe I should not nap they use to help me now I cant nap because my body is wired and in high gear its hard and makes it harder to sleep at night. I always was a worrier but nothing and I mean nothing like that, can panic downgrade to GAD while you are recovering? Is that a strange question? You are correct when you said "panic has somewhere to go" it will stop but GAD is all the time, neither is good I know, I would like to be the heck rid of them both, it effects like everything in you're body.
 
I am sorry what you went through three years ago, and so happy you are recovered, I hope to be there soon too, or at least functioning much better than I am now, you seem to be able to distinguish the physical from the emotional, I cant do that yet I dont know what physical or emotional?! but I do know anxiety makes both worse. Like right now I have a bad tummy ache and I dont know if its something I ate or just the anxiety, the pain is bad and I dont know what it is? trying not to dwell on it.
 
I am not to far in the program yet, I keep going back and reading what I am stuck on, I dont want to go forward if I am not ready, I think I tried to hurry before and had a setback. I so want this too work and get whats left of my life back.
for 13 år siden 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Debora

Did your therapist ever mention GAD, Generalized Anxiety Disorder and the possibility you might have it. It is characterized by excessive worry and anxiety that seems to come about for no reason. Both of which the person with this find it very hard to deal with since they seem to come from nowhere.
CBT in GAD I would thing would be geared more toward dealing with the worry than coping skills for panic. Both necessary but done in opposite order.

Worry is far more tiring than panic, panic has some where to go and a set of rules to follow (relatively). Excessive worry never shuts off. One worry leads to another. Worry can be subconscious as can anxiety. Panic seldom is. It usually happens and then fades. It is usually the panic symptoms that cause fatigue. 

Just curious is all. Since I have no personal experience with GAD.

Davit.

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