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All about me!!

for 17 år siden 0 +0 / -0 8760

Jaci, Don't be too hard on yourself. Just as Diva said, moments like these will bring out higher anxiety levels and it's okay to lean on people through those times. Also remember the five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargainning, sadness and acceptance so what you're feeling is quite normal. Keep challenging those anxious thoughts and managing as best you can. Also be sure to keep us posted on how you're doing and let us know if we can help you in any way. Danielle ____________________ The PC Support Team

for 17 år siden 0 +0 / -0 2101

I am most happy I could help Jaci :) Please feel free to post some more if you need to I will try to reply as promptly as possible :) -Diva

for 17 år siden 0 +0 / -0 28

Thanks so much Diva!! I know it's not the end of my world. I just hate myself when I get like this. It's not like I didn't know he was sick and things could get worse. But I'd conviced myself that once he had the surgery, we'd bring him home and slowly he would get better. Never maybe the way he used to be, but he'd be more like his old self. Well I guess now, that isn't going to happen. It's not like they gave him days to live. We are going to bring him home and we'll manage with whatever we have to. Me included!!!lol Thanks again for always listening and having just the right words for me.

for 17 år siden 0 +0 / -0 2101

Hiya Jaci, Don't be so hard on yourself. Situations like this are bound to create high anxiety and panic. And it is ok for people at your work to help you out. I am sure if they do that it is because they like you because you are a good person. And it's ok in extreme moments to have the help of those who like us. As for your family, the best you can do for them is take good care of yourself, be patient for yourself and just take care of your anxiety until you are ready to spend time with your dad. Anyway, I wish you all the best, I know what you are going through, my dad has been fighting his cancer for 6 years now. Hang in there and my prayers go out to you and your family. -Diva

for 17 år siden 0 +0 / -0 28

Well I'm back at it again. We saw a surgeon this week. Things don't sound very good for my dad. You can convince yourself of anything, but when you hear the words "surgery probably won't help" and "maybe you'll make a year" the bottom fell out of my life again. And once again this is all about my anxiety!!! I can't even keep myself calm enough to go see him in the hospital. My parents need me and all I can think about is myself. Fear I understand about losing my dad, but this anxiety that my life will forever be like "this"!!!! I thought I was really doing much better. I'd stopped taking one of my meds. I was able to handle the everyday "panic" that we all get. Forced myself to stay in a situation when I could feel the attack starting. And worked through it instead of my usual running away. But this . . . I can't seem to get past it again. Everyone I work with is so understanding of my needing special treatment when I get like this. I work shift work, and everyone is so accomodating to allow me to work the shifts I like instead of what I'm scheduled to work. And that makes me feel guilty too!! Why should everyone else's life have to revolve around me. I'm really not an attention grabber. I'd rather people didn't notice me when I'm like this. HELP!!!!!

for 17 år siden 0 +0 / -0 2101

You are most welcome and whenever you feel the need to "talk" about this or be heard, write a post and i will be more then happy to read and answer you :) I am very happy that you are getting back to normal and feeling better. Remember be good to yourself :) -Diva

for 17 år siden 0 +0 / -0 28

Thanks everyone for your very encouraging words!! I have been getting back to "normal". Or at least normal for me. It takes me awhile to get back to the "it's OK to feel this way" attitude. But you're right!! My family loves me and they know this is who I am. It's just time for me to realize that!!lol But each day gets a bit easier to deal with and now we just have to wait to hear from the doctors. He's finished his radiation treatments and now have to see when he'll start chemo. But thanks again for all your wonderful words. It really helps to have someone listen to my problems. Friends are great, but someone who knows what this feels like is even better. THANKS!!!!

for 17 år siden 0 +0 / -0 8760

Jaci, Don't feel guilty, it may just be habit. Think of it this way, you spend most of your days focused on your anxiety levels and maintaining them at manageable levels. This stressor is no doubt increasing them, making you more anxious. Realizing it's making you more anxious, also helps to feed your cycle. Keep challenging your anxious thoughts and again focus on you. Don't feel guilty. Once you grab your bearings so to speak, you'll be better able to help them in their time of need. Keep persevering! Danielle ________________________ The PC Support Team

for 17 år siden 0 +0 / -0 2101

Thank you angel for your encouraging words and for your prayers :) -Diva

for 17 år siden 0 +0 / -0 375

God bless your fathers. May they both live long and heal quickly from this. I promise that they are in my prayers. I know that we tend to over react to little or big things....and we always tend to think of whats happenign to US as oppposed to what is happening to that person. I know how you feel. I always fear what may happen to me (and fear that i may get that too etc etc). But dont beat yourself up for feeling that way. I mean, lets face it, we are 'what if' people....and we tend to get more anxious than others. But thats fine. Learn to accept yourself the way you are. And learn to accept your fathers situation as well. Just have faith that God will never give you a situation that he thinks you cannot handle. Ok? Stay strong....and be strong for your family. They are all suffering like you now. But in time, things will get back to normal. I promise. God bless you both!

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