Hi, Tara. I want to make sure you are OK. I've been suffering from this disease on and off since I was 8 (I'm 35 now). I, too have tried being on and off meds. I'm not advocating them for anyone who doesn't want to take them, but for me, I couldn't function without them. I was once asked by a therapist if I were Diabetic, would I not take insulin? It's the same with anxiety meds. Please keep an open mind. I know you want to do it on your own, but sometimes, meds are the best way to go, at least until your symptoms lessen a little. Again, I'm not trying to tell you what to do, I'm just giving you a little insight into what's happened to me. The side effects go away after a while and once you're on the right combination of meds, you're life will turn around and be more positive. You sound so much like me. I think we have a lot in common. Good to see you on the site. Keep in touch.
Katie :)