Hello Miki and thank you for your reply. Me and him are doing ok for the last few days. The last few days have been rough for other reasons but the hubby has been good :) I am doing ok considering. I figure I will be ok, I am a tough cookie! Thanks again for your reply!
I'm sorry that you had a tough time with the hubby yet was able to resolve things. The questions you've asked... reminded of some questions I have asked in the past. But I'm glad that you were both able to communicate your feelings to one another. I hope you have a nice rest of the day.
Yesterday I had a nice very relaxed day.Me and my husband managed to get along. He did as he promised and gave me lots of his time and help. It was great.
Tonight will be his night for himself. He knew that in advance so he could plan his game stuff. Me I called my mom and we will walk tonight together most likely. Walking with mom is always a hoot. We chat tons and have a good old time. So that is something to look forward to.
Now I am having a rough morning but I feel ok anyway. Does that make any sesnse? I mean I feel ok as in I know it will pass and I will be just fine. Just one of those funky mornings lol. I am going to go get some work done very soon and catch up for work. Wish me luck!
Thank you for all your support and you caring and wise replies! "Sniff " I am very touched, you are all so great!
Last night me and my husband ended up having a long long long talk (like 4 hours!). It was exhausting! At some points I could feel the anxiety go up and up...Had to do some deep breathing and just let myself settble back down. But we got through it with minimal screaming so that is good! Any type of talking like that or conforntation always makes my heart beat faster and makes me feel kinda dizzy. For me there is a strong tie between this and anxiety. But oh well we both got through it which is the important part!
I think it was a good talk. At some points it felt more like negotiating a peace treaty! We need our own personal UN lol! He did say he would try to give me first whack at his free time so that I would feel like I come first. And that was his idea, not mine. He actually offered way more then I was ever gonna ask for. But hey, if he is offering... He knows that I won't take all of it. To put it in his own words:" I am not worried, eventually you will be sick of me and you will be begging me to go play anyway!" LOL!!! I do need alone time so I definitely don't forsee myself taking all his free-time from him. But I do love that he will ask me if I want time with him first, before he goes to sit down and play! That made me feel so much better. When he said that to me I started balling uncontrollably, I mean I was blubbering! I finally felt like he had heard me and like he trusted me to be reasonable about this! He asked though that if he plans things with his buddies that I continue to respect his plans which is easy since I already do. Then we talked about tons of stuff that was bugging us and made some compromises. I totally intend to keep my end of the bargain since what he asked for is totally reasonable. I hope he feels I was reasonnable too. I do intend to try and give him as much alone time as possible without feeling too alone as I know he is much more solitary then I am. I just love that he is willing to put me first for the first time in 10 years! Now, remains to see if we both manage to stick to our end of the bargain! I sure will try. Plus, I intend to clarify what would make him happy. Since he is not talkative my end of the bargain is lighter then his. As such, I will try to clarify what would make him happy so this deal can be well more fair lol. Anyway, I think it was a productive talk. We will see.
Today I am exhausted and drained and as such more anxious. On the other hand though I am handlingg it really well considering everything that is happening! Overall I feel much much better. Thank you again for all your support and caring!
Am wishing you luck , have a great walk . 
. I really hope this works out for you both whoopee . 
" I am very touched, you are all so great!
to all!
