I've been continually chipping away at "not good enough". I'm a perfectionist and when I'm not on my "A" game I tend to discount all of my achievements and focus only on the shortcomings. With the quitting smoking ,my negative core belief manifests itself by telling me that I should be able to just quit cold turkey and not drag it out with the NRTs. In the past I would just say my efforts aren't "perfect" so just forget about it and smoke. Now I'm telling myself that I'll get there at my own pace and in my own time. What's important is that I'm not smoking and I am successfully following the program laid out for me by the smoking cessation counsellor. I also remind myself of my successes with other addictions I've had in the past and other successes in my personal growth over the last several years.
Now that you’ve had an opportunity to take a look at what some of your negative core assumptions are, it’s time to start working on developing healthier core assumptions. Here are a few guidelines to follow:
One of the biggest problems is working on too many negative core assumptions at a time. Try to stick with one at a time.
Remember, your negative core beliefs have been with you for a long time and it will take some time to change them. This is a long-term project.
Keep your goals reasonable & reachable. If you think you’re “unlovable” today, you won’t become perfectly lovable next week. Instead decide what lovable means to you. Does being more lovable mean having more friends? Never being alone?
