[quote]
I just don't want to quit and I am monumentally angry and resentful that I have and was forced to by some health problems.
[/quote]
[quote]
I simply cannot be positive about this quit, I'm trying, but I just can't.
[/quote]
[quote]
it makes me furious that he can smoke and I can't.
[/quote]
[quote]
I can't stop being mad at the world.
[/quote]
There sure are a lot of "can'ts" in your post. For just one day, try changing those can'ts to can. It would sound like this:
I can be positive about this quit.
I can stop being mad at the world.
I can choose to quit.
On the other hand, as others have said or alluded to, if you don't want to, then you probably won't. Certainly no one here is forcing you to. And health problems don't force anyone to quit. Lots of people smoke with an oxygen tank strapped to their body. You can, too.
It is totally your choice. Choose to smoke. Choose not to smoke. Make a decision and commit to it.
Once last thing about cravings. Every now and then a thought about smoking crosses my mind. It's just a thought. To me, a craving is one of those deep physical shaky things that happened in the first week. I haven't had one of those since...well, the first week. I think I said this to you before...as long as you keep putting nicotine in your body, you will be craving. Once you are clean, those physical withdrawals will go away.
Rusty
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B]12/13/2004
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 916
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 25,648
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $3,206.00
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 129 [B]Hrs:[/B] 5 [B]Mins:[/B] 43 [B]Seconds:[/B] 17
-
Quit Meter
$57,824.00
Amount Saved
-
Quit Meter
Days: 695
Hours: 20
Minutes: 1
Seconds: 10
Life Gained
-
Quit Meter
5560
Smoke Free Days
-
Quit Meter
222,400
Cigarettes Not Smoked