I am remembering now when I first started to have some anxiety issues; my daughter had just left for 7-week summer camp and I had been in the hospital for dehydration. A nurse here at work suggested I take a few minutes a day to cry. After I allowed myself to do that, my stress level improved a whole bunch.
So, I guess I will allow myself to feel disappointed and to cry and I won't fight those feelings. I spoke to my boss about the cancelled plans and she is so positive. She hoped that I would still take the time off to try to do something else fun with my family.
I should add that this cancelled vacation situation reminded me to stay in the moment. In other words, rather than dreaming so much about the future, I should celebrate the good parts of today. There were a lot of good things that happened this weekend, too. Every day is full of moments, good and bad - I like the think about the good ones :)
According to my therapist all the emotions should be felt and none suppressed. Just don't get stuck in any of the negative ones. In other words feel sad, cry, get it over and let it go.
I agree with her on this. Then bounce back to positive as you are doing. (this way they don't get stuck at the top of your experience memory as negatives) Emotions influence thought. Best to feel them and be done with them. (sad is like mini mourning, a necessity.)
There is nothing wrong with feeling disappointed when something doesn't go as planned. There is also nothing wrong with crying if you are frustrated, upset or even just emotional. Crying can be a healthy release. Feeling negative emotions is a healthy part of life and you are right they shouldn't be entirely avoided. Having a positive outlook doesn't mean you never see the negative in a situation, you just chose to focus on the positive but you can still acknowledge the negative.
What do you feel you need to do regarding these bits of bad news?
You're aware of both it sounds. However, as I struggle with my depleted resources, you need to find some replacement for the vacation so you can "recreate" what we all need - equilibrium. That's easier said than done. Hopefully you purchased travel insurance and can move on.
Sorry about your relative's loss of their home. Hopefully they weren't there too long so they can just see it as a building...?
Enjoy your week. We're have unseasonably mild temps and it's a wonderful pre-christmas gift.
I wanted to let you know that I do read everyone's post and I always wish you well even when I can't say so.
We had a weekend with lots of news. I am trying to remain positive and I think that I am doing a fairly good job of it except for one one worry - that maybe I should be negative to get my sadness and disappointment out of my system?
Here's one of the bits of "bad" news, for an example. Our airline had to cancel our flight that was to take us on our February vacation. They are no longer flying to our destination. The kids were sad but I think, after the weekend, they've moved on. So, in my head, I am positive because - I can't change what happened. But my heart aches a bit. I am uncertain if I should try to acknowledge my sad feelings and cry - or continue to look at the bright side.
I keep telling myself that people in my family have their health and we have each other and that is what matters. I mean even our family member who lost her home over the weekend has a place she can go. So, things really aren't that bad.
So, should I focus on the good in Life? Or am I potentially suppressing feelings that I might need to show. Any thoughts?
