Hiya Cyn!
I know how you are feeling right now. I had that when I went back to work a few years ago. I also have that everytime I go back to work or to school after an extended break. It is scary I know.
I find that some things really help me. I hope they will help you too. Here they come in no particular order.
1. Doing some breathing exercises like deep-breathing or the box-breathing taught here in this program or whatever works for me :) I try to do it at least 5 minutes twice a day.
2. Doing some relaxation techniques like the progressive relaxation taught in this program. I lie down in my bed and listen to nice soothing music and do my box-breathing for 5 minutes, then my relaxation for 30 minutes, then my box-breathing for 5 minutes. I find it often helps me release major tension.
3. Walking. I find that walking really helps my stress levels. If you don't like walking I am sure any kind of exercise you like from yoga to rollerblading could be good. I find exercise is great to make me feel good and much more relaxed. Now, I don't think you have to do anything extreme, especially if it scares you :) After my relapse, I was super afraid of exercising because of how it made me feel, like winded and stuff. I still am afraid of high impact exercises and I do much exposure work for it. But I do love to walk now. I find a good long walk at a nice pace makes me feel much more relaxed. All this to say not everybody likes the same level of exercise and that is ok, but even mild exercise can make you feel much better :)
4- Positive visualisation. I picture myself going back to whatever it is I am going to and being well and I see myself succeeding. I visualise my success in the situation that scares me. It helps me feel better, envision my success and make it happen.
5- I figure out what my fears about this are. I figure out the specific anxious thoughts that are tied to this. Then I apply myself to challenge them all one by one and several times over if need be. I find that disarming the anxious thoughts attached to whatever scares me helps a lot in facing whatever it is.
6- I plan. I plan how I am going to do this. What am I going to do and how and when for how long. I plan what I will do if I need to unwind, relax, if I don't feel well. Often feeling prepared makes me feel better.
8- I remind myself that facing my fears makes me stronger. I remind myself that I am strong enough to do this. I remind myself that every fear I conquer makes me feel better in the long run. I remind myself that once the situation is more familiar and once I have undone the fears tied to that situation, it will get easier. I remind myself that this too shall pass and that the first step is often the hardest. I remind myself that as long as I tried I won, it doesn€™t matter if I stayed there for 5 minutes or five hours, what mattered is that I tried and doing my best is the most I can ask myself. I remind myself to be kind and patient with myself.
9- I try to live in the present moment. Reminding myself that at the present moment I am not in danger, that at this moment, I can take care of myself, that at this moment, I have power over my life.
10- Last but not least! I distract myself! Ok some people will tell you that distracting yourself from your fears is counter productive. But I think that we all need a break now and again and that a good distraction can help you relax so that you can face your fears better later. So I distract myself big time. I read a good book; watch a good movie, a good TV. show, I do some coloring or drawing, some painting, listen to some music, anything to help me relax some.
Ok well, I know we are all different and that we all deal with our stress, anxiety and panic differently, hence why I wrote such a long post. I know not all of this will be helpful to you but I hope some of it will be.
Be proud of yourself. It took a lot of guts to apply for jobs. If you can do that, you can do this! Hang in there and remember this too shall pass! You can do this!
-Diva
