Hi Toni:
Yes, I am going to do the CBT. It does help to understand, but again I have "understood" for 12 years. Actually, the new findings are that CBT is what works for us. The Xanax does help alot, but is addictive. I am very sensitive to medication, so I take .25 mg at a time until I am comfortable. I have promised my husband to take this 4 times a day as the doctor prescribed while going through this course. Also, they have found no medication that "fixes" this. Xanax just helps through the rough period for me. Last night was a kicker, I was elated to see other people but also dismayed thinking I have another three months to go. I want it to stop now. I had a huge attack just thinking about it. Today is new and I have decided to push through small things. It seems to help to say, Okay, this is panic and nothing has ever happened, then try to ignore it. At first it is easier said than done, but I think I can do it. If I can live through this consuming stuff for all these years, it's worth a try. I have only learned this thought process in the past 2 weeks, but it does get easier. Sometime, after doing this, I am completely exhausted, and that's when I start sliding again. Thankfully, husband is doing this with me so he can understand. He helped me to see some things while going through this last night. I cannot imagine doing this alone. Thank God for the gift of husbands. Anyway, I have found out how to get my CBT buddy window to stay open, but not sure how to monitor it. If it is okay, i would like to put you on mine. We seem to have quite a bit in common. Apparently, there is actually something to that in that a certain type of people are more prone to this. These are things I have always known while working for psych but it is a lot better to hear it from a stranger. par for the course I guess. Hope you have a great day. You can do this. I am succeeding, even if it is in small amounts. We will be back in life again soon. 3 months isn't THAT long, I guess. ;)
