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Depressed.....


for 19 år siden 0 658 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
hi vickers, i hope things get better between you and your husband. my husband and i had a 2 hour talk the other day.i tould him everything i have been holding inside about the thing he does thats hurts me. we didnt argue just talked it was great i really believe my marriage is going to start getting better.i for the first time feel like he really does love me. my advice to you is dont hold anything inside tell him how you feel. you will feel better! good luck gina
for 19 år siden 0 387 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Thanks you guys. Here it is the next day and I feel so stupid for letting myself get so worked up. Logically, I know that he deserves his own time and that we all need time to ourselves. It's just that sometimes I feel like I'm the only one running the household - everything is always up to me. And that makes me feel really lonely. Not to mention that it does make me feel invisible because I feel like he doesn't want to be around me. My self defeating demon says, of course he doesn't want to be around you, who would? I hate that demon in the back of my head - I think that's where most of my anxiety comes from. We did make up this morning. I still don't feel a whole lot better about it, but we'll see how it goes. Shell - I think I will try the tips about leaving little notes. At least he will see that I am here and that I do love him. I really don't want him to feel guilty for spending time to himself because I know that's important. It just makes me feel so invisible sometimes. Maybe if I make an effort to make a connection he will too. Thanks for the advice. Alison - are you married to my husband?! Your story is so close to what I'm going through right now! He tells me the exact same thing that it could be worse because at least he isn't one of these husbands that is gone every night with his friends. That is so funny your husband says the same thing!! Thanks for the support you guys - I appreciate it more than you could know!!
for 19 år siden 0 48 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hey Vickers sorry your feeling so down in the dumps. I just wanted to send a little note your way because you are always so encouraging. I get down in the dumps too. It is hard not to when you deal with anxiety. It is like anxiety and depression are cousins. At times I feel really down in the dumps. I don't need to tell you what helps to feel better because I think you already know the answer. As far as your husband being on the computer maybe it is his way of relaxing. My husband is awesome but he is not always around when I need him. I realized that he needs a break from me and what I am going through just as much as I need a break from it. I don't know how you should approach him when he spends a lot of time on the computer. Maybe you could give him a hug and a simple kiss on the cheek. You could write a note and stick it on the computer that says I miss you. Maybe subtle hints like that will make him realize how much he misses you. If that sounds dorky I'm sorry. I am sometimes taken in by Cinderella stories. I just wanted to send a note in hopes that in some ways it will cheer you up because you have cheered me up and relaxed me many times. Thanks. Take Care
for 19 år siden 0 90 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Wow, sounds familiar! My husband was ALWAYS on the computer, night and day. Gaming, paying bills, for work, boards, and on and on. It was always a good reason, he really liked the paying bills one! I had envisioned myself putting a hammer through it at times! It was a huge source for many fights/heated agruments. He always said, it could be much worse, as in he could be out with friends till all hours of the night. He always debated just how much he was on the computer. And on and on. Sadly I think he changed because I would pretty much never sleep with him because why would I want to. Not alot of intimacy in watching him on the computer! By no means am I suggesting using sex as a weapon, I'm just telling about my experience! Nevertheless, I don't know if I finally got through to him or what. He isn't on it nearly as much. I know how you feel, like your invisible. It makes you feel like you don't matter. That he isn't interested in what you have to say or how you've been feeling today. I completely understand. I guess men use it has an escape. The key is moderation. Basically what we worked out is sit and talk once the kids are in bed for 15-20 min. Then do your own thing. He goes on the computer and I have a bath. Well, I don't know if that was all way too much more information than you were looking for. But I just wanted to convey is I know how you feel and you have the right to be upset and now you just need to make a plan so anyone feels like their needs are being met. Cheer up! :)
for 19 år siden 0 387 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Does anyone get seriously depressed? I don't know what's wrong with me the last few days. I have a good life. I have a good job, I have amazingly fabulous kids, my husband is usually a really good man. But today, I feel so alone. I feel like nobody cares and maybe I don't deserve to have anyone care. I got in a huge fight with my husband tonight because usually he is a very good man. My only complaint is that when he's home, he's always on the computer. It makes me feel unwanted and lonely. The computer is upstairs in our bedroom and that's where he always is anymore. I come home from work, he doesn't come down and say hi. We get home from the store or something, he's right upstairs back on the computer. It makes me wonder if it's because he doesn't want to be around me. Like maybe he's just sticking around for the kids sake. It also makes me feel like a spoiled brat because other than that, he's a good man. Am I wrong for feeling so lonely? Am I just being stupid? I even asked him during our fight if he wanted to be with me and he wouldn't answer me. I am so angry and depressed right now. Sorry for venting and being stupid. Does anyone ever get depressed and lonely and made to feel like they're complaints are just stupid? Maybe I just expect too much.

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