I hope someone can advise me as I am in a bit of a mess.
The weekend is looming and because I suffer from agoraphobia, the pressure is on. My boyfriend will want to go out but because I haven't been out all week, I find that when I try to do it, the panicky sensations overwhelm me. I don't want to let him down. He is busy during the week, so chances to go out are at a minimum.
But there is something else making this situation even worse, if that is possible. My boyfriend has always told me that he loves me. When we argued last, he said he wasn't sure if he did. I don't know where I stand. The house is his, he could throw me out. I love him so much but I am scared. I don't think I can still live with him if he doesn't love me but I have nowhere to go, no one to turn to. This makes me feel less like going out if you know what I mean, it just makes me feel incredibly depressed. I work for him, do everything I can for him but in a way I feel deceived.He told me before how much he loved me but it is almost as if when there is an argument, he takes that away. I do my absolute level best not to row with him, not to stress him out. I wasn't happy where I was living before but I gave it up to be with him, live with him. Can someone please help? I have never felt more alone and it is so hard to cope with anxiety and agoraphobia as well. Please help.