I now believe that I have relied too heavily on distraction as a coping technique, I need to go to the next step. Without question it was an important component in helping me get where I am today, but I need to do more. I wish you all the best Trish in your desire to learn meditation again, you know that that there will be at least one other person trying along with you. Thank you for your helpful comments. ps: going to pick up a copy of Power Over Panic

Beachnut, I was reading a transcript on an interview with Bronwyn Fox, author of Power Over Panic, she suffered panic attacks and agoraphobia, she spoke that meditation helped her to recovery, it was interesting to read that someone asked was using distraction acceptable. She replied yes, but that you won't get permanent recovery by using distractions alot, because we arent confronting our thoughts and fears. She admitted that meditation is hard in the beginning because she couldn't relax. Im the same, I use distractions mentally or keeping busy to ward off my nervous feelings from becoming full blown panic. But it is just a coping technique for me, Im truly not facing it, hence Im not moving forward only staying in my present state. She went into how in the beginning of mediation its hard People have trouble meditating or relaxing because they are frightened of either letting go of control, or of the sensations of their body relaxing. Some people have not relaxed for many years, and when their body does begin to relax, they think their worst fears are coming true! This really rang a bell with me, as I tried meditation and did find the sensations uncomfortable, not panic ridden, but hard to accept the sensations. So I gave it up. Now I truly will start to learn it again as she stated it is the opposite response to flight or fight response we get. I will just have to keep at it, till the sensations are fleeting and no longer scary too me. To this day she stated she still gets an occasional panic attack once every 9 or 12 months, but continually practices mediation everyday, and doesnt let the fear take over, that it has made that much of an impact on her. She has been off medications and basically has mind control over her panic for 15 years. Keep posting, Im sure one way or another we will eventually be able to ride out the trapped feelings, like a fleeting episode of heartburn. Trish

Thank you Trish for your comments. Boy, talk about hitting the nail on the head. Yes, for starters I do keep very busy when I travel and I would agree that it is a coping mechanism (good and bad). I am an early riser and when my eyes open up I am generally fully alert, almost instantly. The early mornings are not easy because I'm not diverting my thoughts with activity, those thoughts can sometimes turn to thoughts of being trapped. I usually listen to the radio (ear piece) to try and divert any negative thinking and sometimes I am able to fall back to sleep, generally though I am up and on my way for a run. Again this activity (radio) is another way of diverting my thoughts. As you said, I basically keep busy throughout the day. I must say that since I have started traveling again :) :) I have had some great trips, but I have never know what it feels like to truly relax, to lie on the beach and let my mind drift. I do understand that for someone like myself, and many others, that just lying there and letting go is a very difficult task, it's about the control. How many times have I read where someone has said, "If I could just get up there and fly the plane I would be fine", that sounds similar to what you said, "Although in our minds, we know that if I could just pick up my house, and take it with me on trips, the anxiety would just diminish.". You also asked me if I was busy at home. Yes, I run a family business that keeps me very busy however I can safely say that I don€™t have feelings of being trapped at home. I used to struggle at one point in my life with being in large meetings, in theaters, and so on and feeling trapped but I have worked through that. The new twist on that last trip was that it was the first time that I had traveled with another couple and the intensity of feeling trapped went to a higher level. I used many coping techniques to get me back on an airplane and I also used the same techniques to help me stay far from home. I new deep down though that I was going to need to do more, to take it a step further. I think that from what you said and what my instincts are telling me is that I need to learn to relax my mind, to LET GO€¦just writing that is not easy for me. As you can imagine the thought of meditation or something similar is n

Hi Beachnut, Seems your one that copes with panic and anxiety by the feeling of needing to be moving, doing, which is a coping mechanism. Perhaps that is your biggest obstacle is when the moving has to stop ie, your friends left and you were able to stop and relax, it hits full force, causing the I can sit still with these thoughts, feelings, symptoms, I have got to go and NOW. What do you to relax at home, or do you find yourself more prone to keeping constant busy, till your just plain tired and worn out by bedtime? Or are you more relaxed at home since you don't feel trapped? Its fleeing to our comfort zone that helps relieve anxiety. Although in our minds, we know that if I could just pick up my house, and take it with me on trips, the anxiety would just diminish. We are associating the places of comfort with no anxiety as our escape.

I'm beginning to think that I'm the only one who has trouble with this part. :)

It was very nice to find a site dedicated to panic disorder. :) I had difficulty getting on a plane but I've pretty well gotten past that one, my problem is occasionally I struggle with being away from home and feeling trapped. I have actually had some very good trips where when I did get anxious and feeling trapped I was able to get through it. Unfortunately I suffered a setback while on a recent trip with friends (first time with other people), I became quite anxious and feeling trapped. The thing about this trip was that I was responsible for taking our friends around by car day and night. In looking back I'm not sure how I managed to chauffer everyone around in the state that I had managed to get myself into. I can say that THERE IS NO QUESTION that one can carry on while under great stress from being anxious. Anyway my wife and I were scheduled to be on that trip for 14 days while our friends were there for 7 days. By day 8 I was so exhausted and in such a whatiffing state that I returned home€¦with my wife of course. We came up with a lame duck excuse for our friends when we got back home, I felt one inch tall after that. We have a trip planned in August with our two kids for 14 days and I€™m feeling so so about it, I just don€™t have the confidence that I had before the trip described above. As positive as I€™m trying to be I€™m thinking about how I€™m going to feel about being away and feeling trapped, I worry about the whatiffing starting up once again. There is no question that I€™m going to go on the trip, I don€™t feel the same pressure at all with my kids as I did with my friends. After all that I have said above (sorry about the length) I was wondering what anyone else has done for themselves in dealing with thoughts of feeling trapped and being away from home? Lastly, I have read a number stories (books) where people have had great difficulty GETTING THERE and basically having a good time while there only to start getting anxious thinking about the return leg, I on the other hand have little trouble getting there and struggle with being there. Lots of there€™s going on. :)