Hi Freedomforme!
I understand exactly what you are feeling. I went through the exact same thing. My husband is still smoking to this day..............
But......
I had to force myself to get over it. Yes, he smokes. Yes, it made me want one, but only when he burned one. The after-smell, well, we all know how that stinks........... When I got frusterated, and saw him smoking away his frusterations, it made me more frusterated. Same goes with the anger..... Same for excitement!! It happened to be the same with every emotion, and every season.........
Then I realized one day that I got through all of those emotions without a smoke. I did it!! I no longer NEEDED my smoke to accompany me!! I found something else. (Well, it's really food, but that's okay, at least I'm not smoking!!)
So my point is, yes, it is difficult to seperate your quit with his. But you MUST. You are doing a fabulous job ~ don't let anyone take that from you. Keep your head held high, and know that you are accomplishing something that most people only dream about!!
As for now, I still stay inside the house. I will join my hubby outside, but only for a minute. The moment he lights up, I walk away. I don't enjoy the smell anymore. In fact, it makes me cough really bad. I find it utterly discusting and in no way, no how do I ever want to go back....... FREEDOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
4my2girls
p.s.- In March, we have another hypnosis seminar (that is how I quit), and my hubby said he would like to give it a try again!! Every time I tell him how far I've come, he beats himself up for giving up on his quit. So I don't need to say anything else, just how proud I am of myself and my accomplishment ~ he does the rest to himself....
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/5/2006
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 338
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 10,140
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1105.26
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 27 [B]Hrs:[/B] 4 [B]Mins:[/B] 44 [B]Seconds:[/B] 3