[font=Comic Sans MS]Text[/font][color=Purple]Text[/color] Okay so I some what understand what's happening. Here it is. I'm so bad right now that the littlest thing well set me off, like if I get heart burn and I get a shooting pain up my chest I instantly jump into panic mode. Or when it feels like my heart skips a beat. I think OMG I'm dieing or something€™s wrg, does that ever happen to any of you? It's like one thing after another. What I mean by this is one week it's a pain in the side and I think it's either my lung or my liver or whatever. The next it's my heart chest pain pains in my head blab blab. And you would think each time I would learn that it's always nothing or say to my self Melinda you've had a million different pains from month to month and you€™re fine. But as much as I tell my self that it never feels real it never feels as though I can believe it inside. It really stinks and I'm sure a lot of you have been there as much as I have. I would go to the doctors but I don't have insurance and to be completely honest with you I have been to the doc's and had more test MRI CAT scans and x-rays then a sick person has ever had. I have had more blood taken out of my arm that it's starting to leave marks almost like I was a drug user. And each time things have come back fine. (Ha you would think I would have learned by now huh)? But no I keep going from year to year month to month thinking this:( Anyway I have medication (paxil cr) to get me by don't ask how I get it! But I do. And for right now it's the only thing keeping me sane. I just wish I didn't have such a messed up childhood because I probably would have turned out okay. I think I have flash back or something of when my step father used to hit me and scream at me it's weird. And I hold this grudge on my shoulder which I can't get rid of it' I just wish I could let it all go. I have told my self for years not to blame that but' how can I not' I have no relationship with my mother and I feel as though she hates me. She never stood up for me or stood by me and still doesn't till this day I feel as though I am alone. I have friends that treat me better and are there for me more then my mother has ever been I lived with my sister from age 14 to 18 thank you god for her she's my mother and

I know how you feel, I feel like I don't care if I have a heart attack anymore. I wish it would happen so I could get over it already! Medication helps me too. I feel like my own brain is attacking me. I hope you get better soon!

Melinda, It is great to hear that you are o.k. Seriously, if there was any type of problem with your heart the tests would have shown so. In your post please read what you said. It looks as though you have a trend. You go on the meds and then go off when you feel better. Maybe this time try staying on them a bit longer. Talk to your doctor about this trend and see if you both can work out a plan. We thank you for posting your thoughts with us today. We are happy to see that you are opening up to us and are welcome to advise. Take care and we will be looking forward to hearing from you again soon. Melanie

Thanks guys, Yes I did go to the ER for the millionth time of my life not heart attack no nothing! Ha-ha it's a big f***** joke within my head. I hate it, now going on three days of paxil things are getting better and better I'm on 12.5 so it's not working all the way just yet, everyday since I started around 3ish I start to panic again. but things are getting better and better I can't slow down there I feel like I have to go go go all day until like 9 at night I'm losing weight left and right which is a good thing but as soon as the Mr. paxil kicks in I wont care anymore. (I'm sure you guys understand where im coming from lol). I do this to my self I just need to one day wake the hell up and understand that I CAN'T LIVE WITH OUT MEDICATION. But every four the six months I think I'm better again hooray and I take my self of the medication and a month later bang it's back!!!!!!! Then I go a month or two think I want to be thin I want to be thin I€™m fine I can deal I can deal but I can't and have been able to. so now I€™m down to 137 and feeling okay but I know in the next three months I will be back to 150:( but as long as I diet and keep it in mind that I don't want to gain the weight I should be fine:) but I know I wont I kind of get numb to feelings and careless but I guess that's a good thing and I give my self a break right? Then my sisters friend tells me she's been getting the same thing and it's a heart murmur and she's had it all along and she needs surgery for it so now I€™m freaking that it might be the same thing but I had all the same tests she did and it still didn't show up with anything then I€™m think omega what if they missed something what if what if ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. GO AWAY!!!!!!!!!

Melinda, Stress and anxiety can cause the muscles in your chest, more exactly the muscles around your ribs to spasm and ache as if you were having a heart attack. Also the connection of the nerves and muscles from there would make pain go down your arm and stuff. If the pain subsides when you take a warm bath then this should be your problem. You should insist that your doctor looks into it though. You also might have cracked a rib and that would feel the same way. If you were having a heart attack it would've have showed on your EKG and you wouldn't have walked out of the hospital. Besides it wouldn't last for 5 days. However, with anxiety and panic the only way to put your worries to rest is to actually go to the doc and find out for yourself that nothing serious is going on.

Melinda, If you are still having these pains then I would go back to your doctor. If you feel they are a sign of panic then you have to differentiate your panic attacks from this chest pain. You are probably asking yourself how right? Try using our €œPanic Diary€ to the left of this screen. After you have a week completed take the diary to your doctor. He/she can look over your progress and maybe see a trend that you have been experiencing and maybe a plan of action will occur. We hope that you will find an answer to your questions Melinda. Please keep us posted. Take care, Melanie

Hi... I know I am not Anne but I can help u I think.. first of all your NOT having a heart attack and your NOT going to die ( aheart attack doesn't last 5 days).( I know this cause my dad has heart problems). your just panicky I know how you feel though cause I have been having this since I was 15 and I am soooooooo frustrated first I went on Zoloft it was better then my dad took me off them bu then they came back so I went on Paxil 20mg I was on those for 2 years and I had absolutly no panic so my doc took me off them I was fine like you for about a month then they started again about a month ago. I go to bed every night fearing that I won't wake because I think I am going to have a brain anyorisim or a blood clot even when I don't even have a headache. So I am back on paxil and I think I am going to have to be on them for the rest of my life just to keep me sane. YOU ARE GOING TO BE OK trust me I knowe its hard to see it now but u will be just keep telling yourself that or tell someone how you feel and get them to tell your going to be ok My twin sister does that for me all the time and you would not believe how much that helps. I am starting to feel better now so lately I have been telling my self how ridiculous it was to have all these thoughts in my head when nothing is happening. Anyways I hope this helps u abit because I do care about what your going through. What WE have to go through I would not wish on my worst enemy its just such a horrible horrible feeling. SO good luck u will start feeling better soon. Sharmaine

Hi Everyone, (Anne) God it feels as though I get better and then bang I'm having panic attack again! I can€™t win Anyway€¦. Well I€™m now currently obsessing about my heart yet again. I keep getting chest pains in the center of my chest and down my arm and in my jaw blab la blab la blab€¦.. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, so I go and get a EKG and blood work done at St.whatever and everything comes back just fine, I took my self of the paxil cr about three months ago and was doing okay for about a month and have been going strong at this whole panic bull**** since then. Until today I broke down and took my paxil and an avian. F*** Me is it ever going to end, the only good thing that€™s come out of this is the fact that I€™ve lost like 22 pounds yet again and I feel skinny but aside that I don€™t give a **** about anything that€™s going on around me because I€™m wasting so much time worrying my self to death. I went to sleep last night telling my self that I was going to die. And on top of that I have been getting extra heart beats€¦€¦ I€™m just at the point of what if what if. What if the doctor didn€™t do the test right what if he missed something? But then I tell my self IT€™S NOT A GODAM HEART ATTACK YOUR STILL ALIVE YOUR STILL WALKING AROUND. But you all know how it goes right. Then I keep thinking what if the avian is what€™s making me have a heart attack or maybe now that I took the paxil ya that€™s it€¦€¦..anger at my self and my brain for thinking this ****€™ HELP HELP HELP€¦. Anne you out there still? What should I do? Do you think I€™m having a heart attack? Can a heart attack last for five days? I€™m being serous to!