Hi Marianne. You asked what helped me the first time around with the panic. Well, I think a combination of things. First I found an endocrinologist that lowered a medicine that I was on that cut the panic attacks and some other physical problems that I was having in half. The therapist I saw was wonderful and was, when I think about it now, part CBT and part psychoanalytical. Another big difference is that back then I had some agoraphobic type of avoidances, but not like it is now with total agoraphobia.
There was another difference two that I have yet to put my finger on. I went out anyway back then, to school, to stores, wherever really despite the fear. I can remember literally starting out for school, or to the therapist for that matter, turn back home, go back out, turn back, etc. etc. etc. But I somehow did it. It took quite a while.
This time, the anticipatory stuff and fear is so great, that I can't seem to make myself try. The other thing is that even when I have a success (like making it to the therapist or on one of my mini-drives now, I discount it as a failure because I am unable to do it without feeling fear, anxiety or panic. I know that I have to somehow change that thinking (CBT) to get better again. The whole panic/agoraphobia feels more deep rooted or something this time.
Sorry I got so long-winded. I tend to analyze myself when I am writing (which sometimes just makes me that much worse ;). I have to quit thinking so much!!!!
You are a week ahead of me in the program session. It's taken every bit of restraint I have not to download the whole thing to read ahead. I keep picturing one of the sessions up ahead popping up and saying "GO TO THE MALL" and me just freaking out completely :8o: How's that for unrealistic thinking?