Glad to meet you!
I know the path you are on now. I know it well. I have suffered from panic attacks and agoraphobia for years. I remember when they were absolutely out of control - I certainly know what it means to 'freak out' by yourself or in front of others, no fun at all -I have stopped people on the street, pulled over in my car, freaked out in malls, at work - asked even total strangers to 'help me' 'hold me' 'be with me until this passes'. My marriage broke up because of my panic attacks - I have an MVP in my heart and that contributes greatly to my attacks. However! The good news is this. If you keep working on yourself - try and stay with this site, for example, read anything and everything you can about panic attacks and agroaphobia - incorporate anyone that will help you through - having someone to call on the phone helps - anything will help. I can relate to everything you said in your post. My attacks began when I was around 12 or 13, submerged, then came out at me full blast when I was about 27 - it has evolved in an never ending ebb and flow - but, now I understand the problem more and am always working on it.
There is a guy that posts on this site named MrBubble -he had some really good advice about congnitive therapy - try and find his post - read it. In fact, try and go over as many posts as you can - this site just started - it is a valuable tool -
Just know if you work at it really hard and try and help yourself the best you can, incorporate others who have walked your path, and gotten better - you will survive! I am glad you found this site! You will find out about 'staying the present', 'positive self talk' & 'visualizations' and more!
I could go on forever, but, just stick with this site for awhile, see how you like it. As a veteran of panic attacks, I know this is a great opportunity to learn about what others are going through and have gone through and have come out the other side - wounded, but still here!
Maria