Tiger T, Glad it made you feel better to let it out. I often come here and do that. Some can relate and offer suggestions to some parts of what you said; others to other parts. We've been there. Don't give up hope.
Do work the session....I'm still finding negative core beliefs, but the biggies are gone and NOW, you KNOW they are negative core beliefs - that is an accomplishment. Some of us it takes forever to figure that out.
I've got days where I still have to pretend....I canll it "faking it" - same thing. It's hard, physically and emotionally draining. I spend alot of time, doing alot of different things working, really working on things to help my depression.
Read the blogs; comment when you can relate, need to vent, want to share, you've got insight into what is going on - we can learn from your experiences to.
Relationships - Hey, they can happen. I recently entered into one; occasionally have my doubts about was I ready (questioning myself - a no-no); and things are going good! There is a session on relationships. I've worked that session several times with specific people over my time here. Check it out!
Glad you decided to post and look forward to more. I am glad I read your post! I can so relate as can others. There is always hope, courage and this place (a strong motivator and it helps me so much! I come everyday. lol, I usually put my opinions/experiences, etc. in somewhere. Hope you do the same and maximize it's potential!
Welcome aboard.