Hi Bobbi,
Welcome to the site, i have never smoked so cant understand how much it has effected you but i'm sure others on here will be able to.
What has struck me though is the fact that you have defined yourself over so many years as being 'a smoker' as if thats all there was too you.
I am sure that smoking was only a small part of who you were and still are even if you chain smoked other things were going on in your life such as work and relationships. All of these things make up the whole you, not just the cigs.
These are the things to focus on, what are you doing that is different apart from the smoking?
Are you still in the same job, relationship, home etc.
If not these could be more of the change in you rather than just giving up the smoking.
Well done any way. A great achievement. Be proud of yourself.
Try to work through the sessions, it makes you explore who you are and could help.
Good luck.x