Hi Sare,
I just joined a couple of weeks ago, but you have made a great decision by joining us here. I find alot inspiring topics, and alot of people will respond to you. I think however, you should see if you can find a therapist where you are, to help you deal with this on a one to one basis. I found it really helps. And do talk to a friend or someone else who is close to you, that will help also...
hang in there, there is help and hope,
dygt