I am new here, as this is only my second post. My husband died three years ago and before that I was on medication for anxiety given to me by my regular dr and medication for depression/mood disorder given to me by my gynecologist. I had a live-in boyfriend for about a year and because we could not get along and had these constant screaming matches, I made him move out. We are still seeing each other and I have decided to not let him move back in we can work out our issues. Although I don't want to admit it, I think I need some type of therapy/medication change. So, I finally made an appointment with a pyschiatrist for this Friday. I really feel intimdated by this, I guess its the fact of talking to someone about my personal life. I guess I don't want to hear the inevitable from a professional. That yes, I do have a mental illness. My boyfriend I had a great last couple of days together and I really thought about cancelling the appointment. Then bam it hits and we are arguing again because everything he says and does just starts bugging me. Its like he says, a switch just goes off and I change. So of course I am keeping the appointment. Can anyone tell me what I should expect at this first appointment? I want to be totally honest with him but I just can't imagine telling him everything in my life. Especially the embarassing stuff. I also am scared to change medications, even though the one I am on wellbutrin xl does not seem to be working. I am so worry about the side effects. One of the things I believe I have too is OCD which I have not told anyone about. I am a constant checker and it drives me crazy. I try and hide it from people but I know the noticed. Geez I am in my purse I don't know how many times a day making sure everything is there. If my son loses his keys, I freak out until they are found, knowing for sure that someone will break in if they aren't. If I smell something burning, I have to find out what the source is immediately, even after I have checked everything out I still feel uncomfortable, like the house may burn down. Has anyone else had uncontrollable worry like this? Well just a few things I needed to talk about. I am glad I found this site. Thanks for listening