Hey Kate,
I hope you are still looking on here and stuff cuz I still need some support from time to time and it helps to have someone who is going through it or been there. I'm sorry i didn't answer the question about the whole doubt thing the other day because I wasn't really feeling it at the time. I still have my moments, mornings still being the worst. As it is morning here, I guess you could say I'm having a moment. The doubt I feel, and I must say it is lessening, is kind of what you said, a doubt that I will get better. I guess being through this has kind of made me doubt my own instincts and intuition I guess. Sometimes I feel like I can trust them, other times I can't. I feel like they have let me down by getting me into the situation and if I really trust them again, I'll fall back into it...if that makes sense. It seems like sometimes I am ok and doing fine and like you said you felt before, if I get too confident or trust it too much.....it crashes down on me. That is why I doubt myself. If that makes sense. I definitely do feel more like myself and I'm more able to function....I just get scared its going to go away like it did before and does sometimes now. Maybe, this is all a part of the process...getting better. The bad times get fewer and last for shorter times...that is what I am hoping. Since I have started taking the regular Celexa...I've been having a little trouble with sleep...like, I can get to sleep ok, but I wake up several times at night and then I am always up by 7 or 8 in the morning. This is not like me when I don't have to work on the weekend....I'm usually sleeping in till like 10. That bothers me sometimes, but I don't really know why. Anyways, I'm going to end it here and go listen to a relaxation tape. Please respond and let me know how you are. I know you can't solve my problems for me..lol. But hearing that you are getting stronger makes me feel stronger......if that makes sense...:). Thanks so much for the support you have given.
Becky