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for 20 år siden 0 84 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Barbara/Kitn/Depressed; Barbara, even though you felt so horrible at the time, it seems as if you are in fact making progress. And I'm so happy and proud of you for it. I think I can understand what your Therapist said. About fighting to hold on to the only thing you know. Even though it's bad for you and makes you feel miserable. I don't like change myself. Feels like I'm at war with myself at times because part of me is fighting so hard not wanting to change. Yet another part of me is also fighting to make those changes. I'm really happy that you've found a therapist that seems to help you alot. And we're here as well to support you all the way. Keep fighting. We're cheering for you. Kitn.. you haven't posted for a while. I hope you and your husband is doing ok. Please let us know if there's anything we can do. And Depressed, how have you been doing lately? Please remember you're not alone. And talk to us. I think Barbara, Kitn, and I've already said this way early on this post. Sometimes when we express our pain and call for help. Others that haven't gone through this sees it as whinning. And because of that, sometimes we tend to hold it in. Which is really a bad thing to do. If you don't have someone you can talk to or just listen to, we're here.
for 20 år siden 0 142 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Carry/Kitn/Depressed: Carry I'm glad you're using physical activity to keep you busy. It's much better than having a drink. I'm very proud of you. Kitn, I'm sure you're doing well since the poem you sent was so inspirational. Depressed, how are you doing? Yesterday was a bad one. I had a panic attack a couple of hours before my appt. with my therapist. By the time I got to my appt. I was pretty wrung out. I was so vulnerable that when she told me that since my earliest memory of abuse was when I was three, most of what I thought of myself for the past 40 years was wrong. All the responsibility I took for things that were out of my control was wrong. I was so upset when I left and crying so hard that I had to pull over to throw up. My therapist is so supportive that she called me about an hour later to tell me that everything I'm going throug now is temporary and that soon I'll be able to recognize the negative thoughts and turn them around to more realistic thoughts. She said I'm fighting to hold on to the devil I know rather then accepting the new, stronger, happier person I'm about to become. "It's normal to fight change", she said. I've taken over for my parents and abuse myself. I don't know any different. She said my childs mind is strong and I'm trying to fight the only way I know how. If I didn't have you guys to talk to, I think I would have dropped therapy a month ago. Thank you.
for 20 år siden 0 84 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Barbara/Kitn; Sorry I haven't posted in a while. I've been basically buring myself with work and gym. It's kind of hard sometimes because I really had to force myself to get things done. I'm sure you know the feeling. Lack of concentration. No desire for life. Always so tired. I keep trying to distract myself with whatever I can. I'm actually going to go see a movie tonight. I haven't been out with friends for a very long time. I'm thinking it's time I started "hanging out" with people again. Try to make some new friends. Despite how big of a deal this was for me. I think I'm doing alot better then I expected. I was bit worried I'd be drawn back to meds to get me through. I'm sorry I worried you Barbara. I don't know why or how but I lost track of days. This week just kind of... flew by so to speak. I guess it's a good thing. I'll try to be more attentive. ^_^ Thank you so much for your concern. I'll write again tomorrow. And Depressed... Barbara is right. The events that put us in this stage might be different. But the feelings you're having.. I think it's safe to say we've felt it too. Or at least something similar to it. Barbara, Kitn, and I have been supporting each other for several months now. They both have been great help to me. I hope you can find some sort of comfort in knowing we'll support you too. It's hard. But have faith. Pray. We're here for you.
for 20 år siden 0 142 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Carry: Honey, I haven't heard from you in a while. How are you doing. I know you're in a lot of pain, but don't cut yourself off from your friends. I promised to be there for you and I meant it. Please write back, I'm so worried about you. Kitn: I know you're very busy, but we haven't heard from you since that wonderful poem. How is your husband? Is he feeling better? How about you?
for 20 år siden 0 142 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Carry/Kitn: I haven't heard from either of you lately. How are you? Kitn, how is you husband? Carry, I've been so worried about you I thought of you first thing this morning. I really want to hear how you're doing. Please talk to me when you get the time.
for 20 år siden 0 142 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Depressed: I think I can speak for Carry & Kitn when I say: "We do understand." One of the things I know about depression is the isolation. The feeling that no one has ever experienced what you're going through. What we feel may not be the same, but we do recognize the pain. I'll be glad to talk to you.
for 20 år siden 0 1 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I don't know how to start this, but something in me just not feel so right. I have been searching for an answer for a year now, and I finally think that I should admit to myself that I am deeply depressed. It is just weird to think that it is possible since I am taking psychology class in college and should know how to manage myself, but it is just too hard to admit it or even to seek help, and even if I do seek help I dont how to start it. That is why I am writing this stupid message just to get "it" out of my system. I know i am not making any sense, but that is ok. i don't think any one would understand. Perhaps I am in way too much trouble than I realize it, and it is really annoying. I can't concentrate and put my thoughts into coherent sense and am not feeling good about myself or anything else in life. I am not thinking about suicide . . . well not yet because there is something in life that i still cant let go. anyway time to go to class. I'll be back when I have time to share my trouble with you guys.
for 20 år siden 0 142 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Josie: Thank's for your support. My daughter has an appointment with her daughters teacher this Thursday. Hearing my granddaughter talk like that brought back so many memories. I don't want anyone to go through what I went through.
for 20 år siden 0 3043 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Barbara, I can see what you are going through. You definately know when a child has not learned some type of behaviour by their own merit. Try telling your daughter the situation calmly. Voice your concerns not only about the behaviour, but about the teasing towards her. No parent wants their child to be bullied. Work together to find a solution to help your granddaughter. It is not easy, but by taking the necessary steps and actions to prevent bullying now it may assist your grandaughter through life. Hope this helps, Josie ____________________________________ The Depression Center Support Team.
for 20 år siden 0 142 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Carry/Kitn: How are you guys today? Carry, I'm glad you were too tired to have a drink last night, and you know that caffine is bad for the depressed. It took me a while to get over my morning pot of caffine. I drink decaf now, except on weekends. Usually I allow myself a cup of regular coffee on Sundays w/my husband. I'm so proud of you for working out. I know I should, and I was, but I didn't feel bettery the way they promised I would. I have to think of something to motivate me to exercise again. Kitn, any more beautiful poems? Where did you find that one? Hang in there ladies, don't forget that winter & holidays are tough on people like us. I'm trying to be upbeat, but yesterday my six year old granddaughter called me ugly and a dummy. I was devastated. I stayed calm and asked her who called her those names. I discovered that she is being teased by a couple of nine year old girls. It breaks my heart. I was teased relentlessly throughout school. I have to talk to my oldest daughter about this, but I have no objectivity. I'm really ticked off that some parents still allow their children to be bullies. For me, the names I was called as a child & teenager still resonate today. Being abused at home and at school does lasting damage. I don't know the best way to handle this. Any advise?

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