You know, Snowfall, I really think that our friends and relatives are more scared about the concept of depression than we are. I used to think that it was indifference but now I am beginning to see that they just can't handle either us or themselves being 'ill' either physically or mentally and they want to pretend it isn't happening. And it works like that, right? Because we tend to hide away while we're in a down cycle and then come out of it and tell everyone that we just felt like 'crap" and that we're okay now and "not to worry"... we're dismissive about our own sickness even tho' we desperately need them to understand that their help, attention and love will ease the pain of the Black Hole....
You need to study this CBT programme in here for a while... really focus on the sessions and keep your diaries and post often in here.
It is very scary to be in a depression but with the proper prescribed medication (do not self-medicate) you'll stabilise and not keep cycling up and down over time.... Exercise is essential.. I remmeber being in a basement apartment and crying in despair while, at the same time, standing away from the wall and doing press-aways with my hands - exercise and tears!!!
Patrick